Carved Into Trees: A beginners guide to genealogy research

He wanted the world to know their love was everlasting.

With his grandfather's knife, he carved their names

His good intentions and whispers of love caused the tree to decay

The lines from the blade made way for infection to spread

a moment of ignorant bliss took down hundreds of years of growth

- Latecia

Every family tree has carvings. There are experiences we ourselves and members of our family have felt that are filled with pain and abandonment. Some records show the carelessness in simply spelling our ancestors' names by incorrectly writing on their historical files. There is a point in black history where our family becomes property with no names. Genealogical work can be fun and exciting, but it can also reveal where damage occurred.

The blog post Healing Roots, goes in-depth on the opportunities of healing from creating a family tree and those who want to actively engage with the lessons they learn through genealogy are encouraged to read Ancestral Altars for Healing blog post.

Genealogical research, for me, always begins with the intention to heal and not harm. First to heal myself, then my children and to cause no further harm to my extended family. This is especially true when approaching living relatives for dialogue. In the journey of ancestral research care for yourself and your loved ones. Plan to navigate this winding path together with a gentle awareness of the emotions that may arise along the way.

With that said, with a loving smile I share 7 steps to begin your journey of genealogical research.

1. Start with a Clear Objective Question:

Begin your adventure with a single, specific question that piques your curiosity. A specific question, like "Where did my mother's maternal family live before Cleveland?" or "Who was my most recent ancestor to pass as a married couple?" Whether it's about the places your family lived or the enduring love stories, focus on one question at a time to avoid getting overwhelmed. Genealogy is a journey of years as information unfolds with each birth and death.

2. Gather What You Know:

Compile birthdates, death dates, and other relevant information about your family members. Jot down birthdates, obituaries, and family anecdotes in a notebook. Delve into the stories behind the names, asking relatives for full names, and unveiling the narratives behind the nicknames. Each detail forms a unique piece to the mosaic you are creating.

3. Utilize Genealogy Websites:

Explore free genealogy websites like FamilySearch and MyHeritage. Start with the most recent ancestor and work backward, one bloodline at a time. While FamilySearch offers a vast collection of records it feels like a library with endless shelves. MyHeritage provides a user-friendly platform. However, be prepared for occasional challenges in records as there will need to be time dedicated to ensuring the documents belong to your relatives.

4. Organize Your Findings:

Take notes in a designated notebook and digitally file and print crucial information. The websites organize documents, but your personal notes will help in keeping track of the most valuable details. Your journey deserves to be documented. This personalized touch will help you cherish the most meaningful details and stories that unfold. This is also a good place to share your thoughts and feelings about the discoveries you are making.

5. Understand the Multiplying Generations:

Realize that each generation multiplies, making the number of ancestors grow exponentially. No need to rush; each discovery is a moment to savor. Be patient and let the branches of your family tree unfold at their own pace.

6. Connect with Emotions:

As you encounter moments of joy, pain, and everything in between, remember to connect with the emotions to humanize the documents. Practice grounding techniques and meditation to immerse yourself in the lives of your ancestors without being overpowered by feelings and assumptions. Journaling dreams and thoughts during the research process can guide your questions to living relatives. This mindfulness will guide you and offer a unique perspective on your journey.

7. Ask Guiding Questions:

Engage with living relatives in a manner that respects boundaries and acknowledges potential triggers. Engage with open-ended questions connecting what documents reveal about the past to their experiences. For example, inquire about family feelings when moving or explore the emotions tied to marriages and divorces. Family history can stir up emotions, and it's essential to honor each person's comfort level. Understand that paths in genealogy may take unexpected turns, revealing hidden patterns and family identities. No road is a true dead end; it merely requires a new perspective to illuminate the insights it holds.

Remember, this is your journey, and it's as much about the process as it is about the destination. Share your experiences and insights in the comments, and let's celebrate the richness of your family's tapestry together!